Stop Checking On Your Ex

     
      

       Have you found yourself creeping on your ex's social media page from time to time? You find yourself going through their pictures and reading their wall trying to find out what they have been up to lately since the break-up. You snoop trying to find out if he/she is dating someone new and if so, are they happy without you? You try to find out where they are living, what they are doing career-wise, are they miserable without you or better yet, did they get saved yet? You try extra hard not to accidently double tap their picture on Instagram on press the like button on Facebook so that they wouldn't know you were creeping. We've all done it. (I did say WE, right?) I'm here to tell you...STOP CHECKING ON YOUR EX....THEY ARE DOING JUST FINE.



      Usually when you are checking on your ex, that means that they are still residing in your head and also in your heart. You are still harboring some type of feelings towards them whether those feelings are good or bad. Sometimes, we can be checking our ex's page wishing bad on them or hoping they are living miserably because you are feeling hurt and bitter from the break up. Maybe you have picked up the phone or sent an inbox message to them just to say hello. Yes, it is an addictive and unhealthy habit that has to be broken in order for you to heal and move forward. But you're asking well, how is this unhealthy? It isn't hurting anybody for me just to look. You're actually hurting yourself. You're letting the highlight realm of their life steal your joy. Your self-esteem is getting lower and lower. You're keep asking yourself, "How is he/she happy without me?" or "What do they see in him/her that they didn't see in me?" "What could I have done better?" You can't dwell on that. There's a reason why you're not in that relationship anymore. God closes doors for a reason.



     So what is causing you to want to keep this habit up. What is the root to it all?
      It all starts with your heart. What you put in your heart, is what comes out of it. 

Proverbs 23:4 (NLT) says "Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of life."

By checking your ex's page, you are planting negative seeds in your heart. Because you were hurt by your ex, you are planting seeds of bitterness and unforgiveness. You may see pictures of them with a new significant other and start to plant the seeds of envy and anger in your heart, which causes you to wish evil on their new relationship. See how this works? So it's very important that you be careful of what you allow to enter your heart.

                                                         How to get over this habit

1.)Take a moment and reflect why your relationship didn't work. For me, I found that we were just not on the same path. We were unequally yoked. God said that relationship had to end. Our relationship was not glorifying God. I was idolizing that relationship. I put it over all of my priorities including going to church. After analyzing the relationship, I understood why the relationship was not meant to be and that God needed to shut that door.

2.) What's planted in heart is the reason for why you are checking on your ex. YOU NEED TO HEAL. In order to start a new chapter, you must close this chapter. If you are feeling any hurt or bitterness in your heart, you are going to have to forgive your ex . I'm not saying that it is going to be an overnight process because it is not. It took me 7 years to forgive one of my ex boyfriends. Once I did forgive, I felt a freedom that I've never felt before. I finally felt like I had closure and I didn't even need to talk to him. Pray for God to purge your heart of any unforgiveness, hurt, bitterness, or envy. God has the power to break any chain or any soul tie you may have with an ex (A spiritual bond that is formed by pre-marital sex). God has the power to heal any broken heart.

3.) Another way to guard your heart is to do some cleaning on your social media. Start by deleting your ex from your Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc. If that doesn't work and you still find yourself creeping and lurking, you may need to block their page altogether.

4.) Read scriptures that reminds you to put the past behind you and press towards the future.


Your ex is an ex for a reason. Leave them where they are. There's no need to check on them. They are just doing fine.


Acknowledge. Fix. Keep It Moving...